Call me skeptical or bitter, I just don’t believe true love in high school is always healthy. There are the outliers, don’t get me wrong. Some people are able to maintain a positive relationship while still holding onto who they are. However, some people’s growth and sense of self can be disrupted by a relationship.
When you bind yourself to loving (or thinking you’re loving) someone at such a critical point in your life, you miss out on opportunities. You begin to make decisions that should be yours only, while taking the other person into consideration. You begin to grow with someone else when this is a time you should be growing on your own. Think about a relationship as two trees. If you can maintain a relationship growing next to each other, that is healthy. You grow from the same light and the same water. If your branches begin to intertwine, that is when it starts to get dangerous. If the trees decide it is time to stop growing together and separate, they both face damage that may never be repaired.
I’m not saying you shouldn’t date anyone or swear to be single the rest of your life. By dating in high school you allow yourself to figure out what you like and what you don’t. You should just learn when you are getting too attached to a person. No one person (besides yourself) should be your number one priority. If you can’t imagine your life without someone, you may need to reevaluate your views on love. People are unreliable and inherently selfish. They change and they leave without taking anyone else into consideration. The only person you can truly trust completely is yourself. For this reason, putting too much stake into people can hurt you. Don’t swear off relationships due to this, just stay realistic. Make sure the love you have for yourself, outweighs the love you have for the other person. You can be with people, just don’t make them your everything.
Call me blinded by love or a dreamer, but I believe that love is love, no matter the age. Even though not every relationship follows through graduation to move towards greater things, I still have faith in the idea of potential. Each person has every reason to love, no matter the situation. Getting caught up in feelings isn’t a bad thing, but rather a way to grow with somebody else.
People argue that high school relationships are just the beginning, and that eventually there will be bigger and better things. Who is to say that changing and moving forward with one person isn’t the bigger and better thing to have, though? The shrouded idea of these feelings having insignificant value, puts pressure on lovers who believe they can make it. The term “Oh, they’re just in high school,” is thrown around endlessly, when in my reality, falling in love with somebody vulnerably makes it more true. Loving somebody with everything makes the meaning of selfless come to life, and that is one of the most important traits somebody can have. Think again about a relationship as two trees. They don’t have the same roots, but growing and intertwining can make the sight more beautiful and the bond stronger.
I do not believe that every person will be the one and only, I think that we are destine to have more than one love of our lives. If we don’t reach out to every opportunity of love with our whole hearts, though, then how will we know if any relationship we share is real? High school is hard, and many students don’t know exactly who they are. Growing with somebody loving can open our eyes to who we aspire to be in the future, and having the thought of creating a future with somebody else should not be an idea that is shot down, but rather admired. Trust should be held onto and kept with one close to heart. We are placed on this Earth to connect emotionally and physically with a person. I think of it as a scale. The love we have with ourselves shouldn’t outway the love we have for other people, whether they are significant others or not, it should be equal. The good intentions of people surrounding us will hold a lot of the love that brings us towards the end of each day, week, month, year. Who’s to say that we can’t be spending all of that time with somebody who balances those emotions and makes us know the real definition of love itself.
Story by Nira Avari and Lexys Yocom